Despite best efforts and an awesome interview, I was not the successful candidate for the aforementioned killer position. It stung a little that she worded it that way when she called me. "You were not the successful candidate for the position." I, of course, realize that the stingy-ness is just my own head telling me things it should keep to itself, but it's a shame that not getting a job is somehow a measure of success. It was a successful interview, I NAILED being a candidate. I'm the unsuccessful employee, because I SUCKED at becoming one.
Shut up, brain, it's just semantics.
It seems like it all boiled down to politics anyway. The woman in charge of the project seemed like she would have been stoked to have me on board, but I get the sense that there are other powers-that-be that wanted someone else in the organization. Because the organization I currently work for has close ties with the organization I applied to, when I saw the "Welcome, new person!" email, a quick Google search showed that she's not really any more qualified or credentialed. I don't think it's just total narcissism making me think it should have been me.
Even still, there was a small sense of relief that it didn't happen. Even though I do think it should have been me, I wasn't actually disappointed. I'm pretty comfortable in my day-to-day, I guess, so the fact that I don't have to uproot my life and learn something new is where the relief comes in.
The problem, of course, is that I DO have to uproot my life and at least do something new because I've been hoping my career would look different for...oh, 13 years now.
If I hadn't gone back to school and taken on a bunch of debt I'd be much more willing to venture out on my own.
But really, I need to just stop whining about it, remember my plans, and exercise a little patience.
Good luck on that one.
6:51 p.m. - 2015-02-07
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