There are days that I think it's best to leave it all alone. It's been so long, and we might be better off without being in each other's orbit. These are the days I remember how ugly it was, the times of utter apathy, and the lies, especially.
But there are days that I consider that maybe I knew you better than anyone, and that you have pieces of my story that aren't all that interesting or helpful, but you were there to bear witness at least and pull it out of me sometimes too. These are the days I wonder if you're okay, and I start to forget anything but the good parts and consider if there'd be anything worth hanging on to. These are the days that I wonder if we ever did help each other through anything in our youth, and if we could do it again.
These are some weird times we're living in, and I go between longing for connection and wanting to take care of just myself. it's more complicated than that, but everything seems amplified, one way or the other.
The internet of yesterday was made for this sort of atmosphere, but it's so far behind us now. If anyone is still lingering, looking for...I dunno, a remnant of what was: nosioprednet at gmail dot com. Greet, chat, joke, scream, yell, whatever you need.
7:37 p.m. - 2020-04-26